Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Love doesn't hurt!

Yesterday the #RayRice video happened thanks to TMZ. I have to say I was shocked by the comments on social media from everyone especially women. I’m disappointed at the fact that some women can have a complete disregard for other women and their struggles. We must show a united front, because, domestic violence is on the rise? 

1. 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence during her lifetime.
 
2. Women experience more than 4 million physical assaults and rapes because of their partners, and men are victims of nearly 3 million physical assaults.
3. Women are more likely to be killed by an intimate partner than men Women ages 20 to 24 are at greatest risk of becoming victims of domestic violence.
4. Every year, 1 in 3 women who is a victim of homicide is murdered by her current or former partner. (www.safehaven.org)

A lot of women can't understand how this women, or any women, could stay after being treated this way. How could she then go on and marry a man that abuses her. Well I don’t believe there's a cut-and-dry answer to that question. However, love can be toxic, and very addictive... like a drug. When this is the case, it becomes a very volatile situation when it involves the wrong person. We, as women, may stay, or tolerate, the behavior a number of different reasons: kids, money, sex, comfort, low self esteem, etc….But, in my opinion, the main reason we stay because we truly believe we can change him. But the harsh reality is WE CAN'T! We think we can fix him, make him put his hands down, make him stop cussing us out, make him stop cheating, etc… We revert back to that emotion of if only we would change whatever we did to set him off in the first place. We start making excuses for them. Listen ladies we all heard them before: I'm sorry! It won't happen again! I love you! I have a problem! Well the only true statement is the latter! He has a problem, and it has nothing to do with you, or anything that you've done! I grew up around so called “men” who put their hands on women, and for every time he apologized, he eventually did it all over again, and each time the violence got worse! I used “we”, because we all have been this young lady one time or another. We all have suffered some form of abuse...emotional, mental, or physical. So let’s stop judging (#JanayRice) her and pray for her! STAND UP AGAINST ABUSE BY LOVING YOURSELF ENOUGH TO LEAVE!!!